time has literally flown.

here i am, two months from getting on a plane + crossing the ocean, with only three days left in the year twenty-fifteen. and i'm trying to figure out where the days went, because the older i get the faster this thing called life goes, dragging me with it.  and at the end of the day (or the year) i'm looking back at all that's happened and it always leaves me amazed.

amazed at the awesome things He has done.
amazed at the numerous ways i've failed, and amazed at the unfathomable way His grace is always there to pick me up + send me forward into life.

this little blog, which i'm refusing to refer to as being poor or sad, hasn't gotten near as much attention as it was supposed to.  so i'm just gonna quote good ol' clive staples lewis (who wrote narnia + mere christianty + pretty much every one of my favorite quotes) so i can feel better about myself:

 life is too deep for words, 

so don't try to describe it, just live it.

because life has been lived and things have happened and it's been deep.

my dear friend, sami wrote this and when i read it i was totally nodding and yessing until i could no more.  so go read it, and love it because she said it really well.

this year i've been learning to wrestle through the times when my head starts getting ideas of it's own and it wages war against the truths i know and hold to be true.  not in a drastic, freak-out way, but in a constant battle that we all go through in losing self to find Him.

and it's a constant circle that could make your head explode, when your heart and spirit knows what is true and right. and yet your mind and emotions in the moment can run away shake things up.

but just like He always does, He brings things back to us, again + again.  washing us in the truths that we know to be true but can lose sight of when we let out eyes slip off of Him and onto this world.  learning to lose self, to find myself in Him (more to come on this, cause it's been a huge part of this year).    

so, as twenty-sixteen comes rushing in with all of its change and newness, i wanna thank you all for sticking with me.  fifteen posts in three-sixty-five days is sad, so sad i'm not even gonna average it out, but y'all have stuck it out with me.  you guys are great, and more of a blessing to me than you know.

and i'm not gonna do new years resolutions (although i might come up with something similar) because we all know they would last a week and then end up in the same box as old knitting projects.  but i'm definitely gonna be hanging around here more often.  after all, someone has to bug you and fill your blog feed with stuff, so it might as well be me.

happy new years, folks and God bless.

until next year.
xoxojana